Wednesday, March 13, 2013


Back when I started losing weight the first time, I didn't really set any concrete goals for myself. I just wanted to be smaller and healthier. At that point, every dropped size and pound was a victory. At size 18, a size 10 or even 12 sounds pretty desirable.
I had no idea what I would be capable of, so I just did the best that I could do. I was excited when I hit size 14. I was over the moon about 10, and getting into a size 8 was a major thrill. Although I managed to squeeze into some 6s at select stores, I never really got myself into that size. I was happy though. The difference a year and a few months made to my life was unbelievable. I had more energy. I enjoyed shopping for clothes. I wasn't mortified in a bathing suit. It was wonderful.

Unfortunately, the farther away I get from the time when I was wearing a size 18, the harder it is to remember what being that big felt like. I think that is part of what has allowed me to get lazy. I don't really, truly remember being that girl, so I appreciate less the work it took to get me to here. I don't want that to be the case!

Today I mostly wear a size 10. My size 8 clothes are very tight and, to be honest, my 10s don't really feel all that great either. Size 10 does not have the appeal it did all those years ago. I know now that I can do better than this!

I still can't say that I have a specific goal. There is no magic size or pound number that I feel would make me happy. I guess my goals are to retrain myself to better control how much I eat and to get back in to the habit of picking healthier foods. As far as size goes, I just want to be comfortable with my body. I want to feel healthy and have lots of energy and to be able to enjoy shopping for clothes again. I know that I will never be perfect, but I want to be always working at being the best Lauren I can be.

And just for the heck of it, here is a shot of me and my boyfriend visiting the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile on my birthday earlier this month.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

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