Skin Deep

I read several blogs and subscribe to several youtube channels that deal with the subject of hair and or makeup.  I started wearing makeup when I was 15.  My mom started me out with Cover Girl.  (I still feel like a teenager when I smell that stuff!) However, we soon discovered that it made my face breakout horribly.  Now, as I look back, I can't remember if I had skin problems before that time or not.  I should look at some old pictures and try to find out.  I do know that ever since that time, my skin has been pretty bad.  I get fairly severe breakouts all along my jaw line and chin on a regular basis as well as random other areas that show up now and then.  Several years ago (wow, actually, I guess probably around 10 years ago...time flies!) my grandma started buying me Proactive to help with my skin problems.  I used it right up until this year, and I believe it helped a little, but never enough.  I finally decided this year to stop using it.  I think it may have helped more in the past than it did anymore.  It wasn't making enough of a difference to justify having her still spending all that money on me.  I have been trying drugstore brands the past few months.  I've switched back and forth between Aveeno and Neutrogena products and a Witch Hazel astringent.  My skin hasn't improved with these products, but it hasn't seemed much worse with them either.  I with I could come up with something that would really clear my skin.  I am almost 30 and am sick of this!  I know I could go see a dermatologist, but A. That is expensive and B. I have an overwhelming fear of doctors. 

Back to makeup...
As I said, I watch/read a lot of hair and makeup videos/blogs.  I love eye makeup.  I think it's fun.  I'm not great at it, but it's something I enjoy playing with a bit.  On the other hand, I find lately that I'm very frustrated with the foundation/concealer/primer/powder aspects of makeup.  I watched a video today about covering spots on skin.  The girl in the video did an amazing job of covering the model's skin and making it look great.  However, she used 8 products (not including brushes) to do it...all the while talking about not wanting to put a "blanket" of makeup over the girl's entire face.  Eight products?!  Who the heck can afford or has the time to use 8 products to cover their skin before even getting to the eyes, lips, and contouring portions of the makeup routine?  A simple bottle of drugstore foundation is around $10-$12, and I don't think these products were ones you'd find on the shelf at Wal-Mart.  It is so frustrating!  And on top of this, I'm starting to wonder if I'm actually making my skin worse with the stuff I'm using to cover it up.  Am I spending a ton of money to clear my skin plus of a ton of money to cover my skin with stuff that is causing me to have to spend more money to clear it back up?  I don't know.  But I think I'm going to try to find out.  I have decided to go at least one full month without any kind of foundation, concealer, or powder on my face.  I actually started this about a week ago.  I know that my skin goes through stages throughout the month, so I feel like I need to let it go through all of them before really deciding.  I can tell you that it hasn't been easy already.  I feel like a lazy bum or something.  I feel like I'm *supposed* to be putting on all this makeup...like it's my duty as a woman to slather my face with 50 bazillion products.  Isn't that  a little silly though?  Didn't God give me this face? 

Anyway, I guess I'll see how things go.  I know that I'll be tempted some days to put on some foundation, but I'm going to try really hard to leave my skin alone (aside from keeping it clean and moisturized).  If my skin is just as bad at the end of the month, I will probably go back to covering it up.  However, I may find that I like the freedom of it.  My hope is that my skin will clear up at least a little, but I have my doubts...we'll see.